How to sell to different personality types and couples

Easy Weddings
Updated on: November 28, 2019

It’s a cliche we hear a lot in the wedding industry, but every couple is different. This doesn’t always mean that every wedding is always going to be different. But it does mean that the way you sell to different couples is going to change.

Why sell based on personalities

The best salespeople know how to sell to several different personalities. When you’re selling to a client or couple you need to mirror the personality of that customer. There’s no point going in hard on the numbers if you’re talking to someone who will be more influenced by their feelings.

We all have a personality type that we prefer to speak or sell to. But selling to that one type won’t help you grow your business. You can sell 100% to one personality type, but you’re still missing out on 75% of your potential business.

Weddings are an emotional occasion whether you’re a driver or an amiable person. Couples need to trust the suppliers that they engage with. It’s not about what personality you are. If you can show a couple that you’re on the same page by mirroring their personality type you will increase your conversions and book more weddings.

selling on personalities
It’s important to know how to sell to different personality types to optimise your sales. Photo by Erin and Tara.

The four major personality types

Personalities make up who we are as people. They don’t mean that one personality is better than another, but they are what makes us all different. Knowing what these personalities are and what traits you can recognise in couples will help you identify who you are talking to. And how you can sell to them.

There are four general personality types that people fall into.


Driving personalities are influenced by thinking rather than by feeling. They want to get from A to B as quickly as possible without being taken along for a ride. They’ll usually be the couples who ask you direct questions and are looking for a direct response.

How to sell to them

Drivers are straight to the point and want the most direct answer. So you want to be able to engage with them in a way that is direct and doesn’t step around the questions they ask.

A driver might ask questions such as “how much if we book today?” or “can you get me the best deal if we book on this date?”

You want to keep them engaged. Responses that move around the questions like “I’ll have to check whether we have availability on that date” or “it depends on what you’re thinking for your ceremony” won’t get cut-through with driving personalities.

Instead, address the question before going into the conversation in more detail. And don’t be afraid to be direct back.

“Prices start from $X. If you’re having a ceremony set up there is an additional fee which is usually around $X. This is the option most couples book.”

The key question to ask when talking to driving personalities is “what do you think?”

Asking them about their thoughts rather than their feelings will tap into that thinking personality more.

“This is the option most couples book. What do you think of that?”

“We can get you an X% discount if you book today. What do you think about that?”

selling on personalities
Drivers will ask direct questions and want direct answers. Photo by We Are All Stardust.


People who are analytical are influenced by thinking around numbers. Analytical couples will usually ask questions about how much things cost, not just in larger terms but in smaller terms such as cost per head. They want to make sure all their numbers add up. Basically, analytical personalities want to get from A to B but analyse everything on the way.

How to sell to them

Remember that analyticals are always thinking about the numbers in their head. They will be influenced by numbers, facts and history such as reviews. Match how you’re talking about the sale with the numbers that they’re thinking about.

For example, imagine a couple is talking to a wedding venue about budgeting $120 per head with 100 guests. Don’t talk about your minimum spend being $X without addressing their specific numbers. That will leave the couple confused as they try to do the analytics in their head.

Instead try something like, “$120 per head will get over our minimum spend. We can also add $X of decorations in. What do you think about that?”

Analytical personalities are also driven by the thinking question.

“X% of weddings are already booked out on that Saturday. What do you think about locking in that date now?”

selling on personalities
Analytical couples will be more focused on numbers such as guest count or cost. Photo by Splendid Photos & Video.


Most business owners in the wedding industry are expressive personalities. This makes expressive couples easier to sell to as matching personalities are naturally easier to mirror. Expressive personalities are driven by feelings. They want to get from A to B while talking about what they see on the journey there.

How to sell to them

If the question to ask when you’re talking to analytical or driving personalities is “think”, then the phrase you want to use with expressives is “feel”.

Expressive couples are much more emotive. They’re usually the ones who have a vision about how they want their wedding day to run and want to know what is or isn’t realistic for their dream to come true.

Talk about the details with these couples. You have the ability to add to their vision so make the most of that.

“We’re able to work with you on your wedding day. What theme are you going for?”

“What colours are you and the bridesmaids going to be wearing?”

“Flowers will really add to the beauty of your ceremony. How do you feel about roses?

“Our chapel is available and has beautiful lighting for your photos afterwards. How do you feel about that?”

selling on personalities
Expressive couples will likely have a vision in mind and are easier to sell on emotion. Photo by Liv Hettinga Photography.


Lastly, there are amiable personalities. Like expressives, amiable personalities are influenced by feelings. However, they are usually more unsure and scared of that commitment. These will usually be the couples who give you all the buying signals that they are interested but don’t sign on the dotted line. Amiable personalities need more support and guidance. They need you to guide them from A to B rather than taking themselves.

How to sell to them

Amiable personalities are similar to expressive personalities in that they will be more influenced by the feelings of how they plan their day. However, they need your help to be able to make the decisions on what they may or may not want.

Amiables find it harder to commit to the details. Weddings can be a significant financial commitment for a couple so amiable personalities may find it hard to commit to services or products if they do have that budget in mind.

A couple might be “umming” or “aahing” about what elements to pick for their wedding day. But they generally know they have that fairytale vision. That’s where you can come in with your expertise.

“It sounds like you like the idea of an outdoor ceremony. Our garden is the most popular option for other couples who are looking for an outdoor location. How would you feel about a wedding there?”

“You seem to be leaning towards something that is more elegant. Our classic cars are timeless and can seat everyone in your wedding party. How do you feel about that?”

selling on personalities
Couples with amiable personalities may know the vision they want for their day but need more guidance and support before booking suppliers. Photo by Manis Moments.

What if a couple is made of different personalities

You’ll often find yourself talking to both parts of a couple. Which means you’ll sometimes find yourself trying to sell to two very different personality types. Use the same wording styles and phrases to address each member of the couple when you’re talking about their wedding.

If a bride is expressive and her partner is analytical, ask her how she feels about a decision. Then ask the partner what they think. Or vice versa.

Sticking with the feeling or thinking approach will help you approach the four different personalities no matter whether you’re talking with them on their own or in a group.

selling on personalities
Each pair of a couple might be different so ask “think” or “feel” depending on their personality. Photo by Dannielle McPherson.

Useful phrases to use when selling based on personality

‘Thinking’ personalities











‘Feeling’ personalities











Want more advice on how to convert more leads? Avoid these phrases when it comes to sales time. 

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Categories: Sales Tips