She is the littlest lady in your bridal party and the only one with permission to capture the attention of all your guests as she walks down the aisle ahead of you. But aside from performing this duty on the day, flower girls can often be overlooked when it comes to wedding preparations and even celebrations once the vows are exchanged. Here’s how to ensure your flower girl feels part of the entire process:
While every couple will have different ideas about the kind of role they would like their flower girl to do, there are a few extra tasks or activities you can do with them to make them feel more included in your wedding day.
Putting in the groundwork and helping her to feel like she is playing an important (not just cute) role in your wedding day means she is more likely to step up to the plate and feel more comfortable when the big day arrives.
Take her shopping
Gone are the days where the flower girl would be dressed in a white dress that is kind of like a mini-me of the bride.
Now there are so many options for dressing your flower girl. You can have her match your bridesmaids, or pick out a completely unique dress that makes her stand out.
To make your little lady feel more included in the wedding day, why not take her dress shopping rather than simply picking something out for her? She will feel like a real princess trying on lots of lovely dresses.
Just remember, her stamina and enthusiasm for shopping will nowhere near match yours, so plan short trips and try to have an idea of what you are looking for before you take her in, so you can be selective of how many dresses you ask her to try on.
Meet the bridesmaids
You can help your little flower girl to feel more at ease hanging out with you and the bridesmaids by arranging for them all to meet in an informal setting before the wedding.
Maybe your flower girl can make a cameo at your bridal shower, or if your bridesmaids are young-at-heart, you can all meet at a local park for a little play date. Having that rapport will help your flower girl to feel more at ease among familiar faces when the big day arrives.
Give them a buddy
If you are having more than one junior cutie in your bridal party, consider pairing them up for the walk down the aisle.
This will help to take some of the pressure off the younger flower girls and/or page boys and also give the older buddy a sense of responsibility.
Offer them the chance to stand with you
Yes, children + weddings = unpredictability, but you can offer for older flower girls to stand at the front with you and the rest of the bridal party during the ceremony if they want to.
As a backup, it’s a good idea to have her parents (or caregiver if she is your child) seated in the front row, so if she gets sore feet, or just bored with standing in one spot, she can easily retreat to a seat with minimal fuss.
Praise for a job well done
We all like being told we’ve done a good job, and your flower girl is no exception. When you have said, “I do” and the ceremony is complete, making time to thank your flower girl and heap praise on her for doing a great job will really make her feel proud to be part of the wedding.
Make her the photographer’s first star
While your photographer will no doubt capture some gorgeous images of your flower girl doing her thing while walking down the aisle, you will no doubt also want her to feature in some bridal party photos.
Make sure you get the photos with your flower girl taken first, so she can pop off to play and not miss out on being the star of the show. Getting her photos taken while she is still energised will lessen the chances of a tantrum.
While you might be happy for your flower girl to spend some time with you at the bridal table, chances are it is going to be a logistical nightmare to have her seated with you for the entire reception.
See if you can add a temporary chair to the table, so your flower girl can enjoy a drink of water or juice with the girls in the front before heading back to her parents or caregiver for the rest of the evening.
A special dance
Once you have shared your first dance with your new spouse and have danced with your mum or dad, consider setting aside a special dance for the flower girl and her chosen partner, if she is up for it if course.
Let her know she can choose anyone she wants to from the guests and she might surprise everyone with an unexpected choice. Then, she can have her moment to shine and lap up the limelight. Chances are, if she’s even made it this far into the night, she won’t be long out of bed!