I want to have bridesmaids at my wedding but I have no close girl friends or sisters that I am particularly close to. My daughter who will be 9 and my youngest sister (19) are all I have but neither live close by and neither are maid of honor material. What should I do?
Amanda M
Question Asked: 13/08/2017
Wedding Date: 16/04/2022
Wedding Location: Brisbane, Queensland 4510
Answered by: 8 Experts
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Hi Amanda,
It would be lovely to have your daughter and younger sister as Bridesmaids. Does your fiance have a sister or sisters that you are close to.
You do not need a Bridal Party but if you really do they would be a good . I have even heard of a Grandmother who was in the bridal party. It does not have to be a female, if your best friend (apart from your fiance) is a male then it is quite acceptable to have him stand with you.
Good luck,
Marina
Hi there, its a real shame your sister and daughter don't live close by as they would be perfect. I think family are great as attendands as hopefully they will always be around. You don't have to have any attendants, you could walk halfway down the aisle, then your partner walk down the aisle, gives you a kiss and together walk back to where the Celebrant will be waiting.
Good luck.
(16) · Byron Bay to Ballina , North Coast NSW and Gold Coast QLD
Posted: 22/08/2017
You can have anyone as bride's maids or bride's attendants as we say now
Think of your friends not just those who are female
I am happy to send you a kit which will help you plan your wedding day
Mario - Treasured Ceremonies
(41) · Cairns, Port Douglas, Mission Beach and the Tablelands but I am prepared to travel nationally
Posted: 18/08/2017
Hi Amanda
That is a tough one. You don't have to have bridesmaids, but as you stated in your query, you want bridesmaids. It's comforting to know that as you stand there, looking at your husband to be, there is someone at your back. I would like to bring attention to your comment that neither your daughter nor your younger sister are 'maid of honour material'. What constitutes maid of honour material? I have a 9 year old son and I would not hesitate to ask him to be my best man should my partner of nearly 13yrs finally agree to marry me (I've lost count of the proposals, I think she's playing hard to get). At the end of the day your maid of honour should be someone who loves you for who you are, only wants the best for you and is happy that you have found someone to commit to. Having your daughter as your maid of honour will also make her feel that the ceremony is also about her as she has been included in it by being asked to assume an all important role. The maid of honour is usually also the brides witness but as your duaghter is not 18 you would have to choose somone else. It sounds like your daughter lives some distance away. Maybe, by including her as your maid of honour, you will re-enforce the fact that, even though you are apart, she is still very important to you. At the end of the day, you don't really want to choose an someone who is not close to you. The main role of the maid of honour is to be there for you. I would ask your daughter, if you want my honest opinion. I also have no close friends here in Australia, but even if I did, my son, Connah, would be my first choice. Best of luck with your decision, I hope that this has been helpful.
(16) · Brisbane and surrounds | Gold Coast and surrounds
Posted: 15/08/2017
Hi Amanda
There are quite a number of marriages with no bridal party or I have officiated marriages where the `Maid of Honour' was a male friend of the bride and also bridal parties with an odd number of attendants.
Go with your `gut' and have whoever you are comfortable with, it could be an aunt, your daughter or sister. You dont have to give anyone the title of `Maid of Honour`.
The most important is that you and your soon to be husband are both comfortable with your bridal party.
Just relax and enjoy your day.
Laurel
(8) · Melbourne and surrounds | Mornington Peninsula
Posted: 14/08/2017
Hi Amanda,
Some people like to have bridesmaids, and others prefer not to. The best part about your wedding is that tis YOUR day, and you can do whatever you prefer.
25% of the ceremonies I've done didnt have bridesmaids, and instead asked some of their friends to take part in some of the special aspects of their ceremonies, and it was all so personal and very beautiful. Perhaps your daughter could present the rings to you both, and your sister could help you in other ways.
I'm happy to speak to you in more detail if you are wanting some advice or ideas.
Regards, and i hope you wedding day is everything you
Annette
Amanda I dont think it matters if the people you chose are 'maid of honor' material, whats more important is that you love them for who they are and they are the ones you chose to stand by you for one of the greatest moments of your life. I agree too wholeheartedly with what Klara McMurray - Funky Celebrant - you are no longer limited in traditions.......go with what you REALLY REALLY want rather tahn what you think it should look like or be.
Ps. I have a daughter same age - they are at the PERFECT age to be the best bridesmaid / flower girl you could ever ask for!
GOOD LUCK!!
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I've performed many a ceremony that doesn't have any wedding party at all, and it's absolutely fine.
In saying that, your daughter and youngest sister both sound like good options, but also, don't be tied into tradition, you can also invite male friends/family if that's more appropriate. The great things about weddings these days, is they're not limited by tradition or culture, you can do what ever feels right for you and everyone will accept and embrace it as your decisions.
Best of luck, i'm sure the right people for the job will be found!
Kind Regards
Klara