You’ve heard the stories about the brides who get larger than life while planning their wedding. The unrealistic demands and tantrums have seen them dubbed bridezillas. But did you know there is a danger of going through your wedding planning a little too zen? These ladies have been coined bridechillas.
Although they may seem preferable to the former, bridechillas have a real chance of causing just as much chaos. Why? Because they don’t step up to the plate and take charge.
You might think giving your bridesmaids free reign on what they might like to wear, or asking your florist to vaguely whip you up “something pretty” might be the best way to make everyone happy, but you will find the happy-go-lucky attitude simply doesn’t cut it in the world of weddings.
Here are some of the cons of being a bridechilla…
Other people may get stressed
This is the big day for you and your partner, so your opinion matters whether you want it to or not. Being indecisive can be super-tricky for the people who are trying to help you create your dream wedding. They don’t want to make the wrong decision for you!
Even if you don’t specifically know what your dream wedding looks like, shrugging off any decisions will place added stress on your fiancé, bridal party, and close family members who have stepped up to help you.
It wastes time
One thing about bridezillas is that they know exactly what they want, and aren’t afraid to tell everyone. Bridechillas, on the other hand, might be so focused on keeping everyone else happy, that they actually waste so much time for those who step up to help.
A bridechilla might say flippantly, “An outdoor venue might be nice…” but for the person organising, this could mean beach, garden, mountaintop, rainforest… Going backwards and forwards with these options to be met with indecision and no solution will get you nowhere fast.
You might be left with little options
When you have 12 months ahead of you, you might feel like time is on your side. But more often than not, you need to book in the major components of your wedding – like the venue, celebrant, and photographer – about a year out. Sometimes even longer if they are an in-demand supplier!
If you rest on your laurels and refuse to make a decision, you will have way less options by the time you get around to booking people in.
Vendors don’t know what you want
A miracle has happened and a bridechilla (or one of her organisers) has locked in a supplier! But now the supplier has the frustration of trying to find out what you want so that they can do the best job possible for you.
The more information you can give to a supplier, the easier it is for them to organise and co-ordinate everything so the day runs smoothly.
Your fiancé will stress
The fiancé of a bridechilla might be fortunate enough that her partner will step in and take over the planning, but if your fiance is just as indecisive as you, or is happy to go with what you want for the wedding (cue vicious cycle…) than you are in trouble.
While you are blissfully cruising through your wedding planning with “do what you think is best,” “I’ll like whatever you decide…” your fiance may start to absorb the stress of the situation.
This is not the best way to start a new life together!
With decisions to be made and no-one to make them, you might find the people you would never ask the opinions of stepping in to take charge. It could be a friend with completely opposite tastes to you, or your mother-in-law who wants a lavish affair, when you would have been happy with a barefoot beach wedding.
You may be disappointed in the end
In your quest to create a smooth ride for everyone and give them all what they want, you might ultimately end up being disappointed with the wedding you end up with. While you will still be married to the love of your life by the end of it, you may end up regretting relinquishing so much control.