No matter how large or small your guest list is, chances are there may be a couple of single people in the mix. Weddings can be a confronting time for the single ladies and gents, not just because they are celebrating another of their friends or family members commitment to one another, but because they often get asked some downright silly questions.
For those who have been in long-term relationships or who have been married for a number of years, the concept of singledom could be quite foreign. However there are some questions you should avoid asking at all costs.
Why are you still single?
This is a classic foot-in-mouth question and can get you into a lot of trouble. The person may have just come out of a long-term relationship and it may have been messy.
Their partner may have passed away, or they may be quite happily single and content on focusing on themselves.
The heart of the issue with this questions is – it’s none of your business! People shouldn’t have to justify their relationship status.
Haaaaave you met Ted?
One of the iconic lines from How I Met Your Mother, but it is also a no-no when talking to single guests at a wedding. Introducing people to one another purely because they are both single is just a little too blatant.
Single people are not as rare as hen’s teeth and you don’t need to introduce them to one another in an attempt to pair them off for the day (unless they expressly ask you to introduce them to other singles that is).
Are you ready for the bouquet toss?
Sure, some single ladies love to get their hands up in the hope of snagging the coveted bouquet. But others are not so big on participating in such an outdated tradition.
Yes, the MC or DJ has announced what is happening loud and clearly and if your single girlfriend is heading off to the bar or enjoying her piece of cake and chatting to friends, chances are she just wants to give the bouquet toss a miss.
Is that your date?
If your friend has bought a plus-one to the wedding, they may just be friends and not lovers. Assuming the latter will just be embarrassing for everyone involved. Let your friend introduce their plus-on to you and you will get a feel for the kind of relationship they have.
Similarly, seeing two people talking to one another is not a sure-fire signal that they are seeing each other, so don’t leap in with the question.
So, what’s your type?
Not the best pick-up line around and definitely not the type of question that should be asked by sticky-beaks. Most people don’t have a quick answer to this question either, and answering it may seem like they’re asking you to make possible partner suggestions. Trust me, they don’t need your matchmaking services.
Do you use dating apps?
Something like Tinder or eHarmony might be intriguing for those who have been in long-term relationships and never got to try them out for themselves. But, that doesn’t mean you can pump someone for information about their experiences on such apps and sites.
Believe it or not, they can be tedious to use and often lead to more disappointments than successes, so you could be unintentionally rubbing salt into some raw wounds.
Also, don’t suggest they give them a try because your Aunty Mary met her second husband through a dating app. It’s either their thing, or it isn’t. And again, it comes down to minding one’s own business…
How long have you been single for?
Being unattached to someone else is not a condition. Single guests should not have to quantify how long they have had the status for.
After all, they may have decided years ago that they were going to focus on making themselves happy and pursue their own goals rather than actively pursuing Mr. or Ms. Right.