Ways to say “I love you” without having to say it

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways…” Let’s face it, you’d probably giggle a little if your significant other started to spout traditional sonnets as a declaration of love. But let’s face it, it can sometimes be hard to express your feelings verbally. Here’s how to say I love you without having to actually say it:

Young woman writing a valentine card

Finding a way to say, ‘I love you,’ or searching for ways to say it without repeating it 24/7 (because you just love them to pieces!!), is much easier than you might first think.

The good news is, as much as 80% of your communication is non-verbal. You use body language, tone of voice, facial expressions and even attitude. There are countless ways you can tell your special someone how much you love them without uttering a word.


It’s absolutely free! You don’t realise how much stronger your bond will become when you can listen to one another distraction-free. Take it all in, process it and be there for one another. Nothing says, ‘I love you’ more than being willing to dedicate time to communicating with one another.

Sneaky notes

If you make their lunch for the day, or often prepare a morning coffee to go, write a little note to go with it. It could have a smiley face, a funny quote or inside joke, or a message to tell them to have a nice day. No matter what you put on there, the surprise will make them smile and warm their heart.

Red lips kiss Good morning on white note message on bed

Get to work

Is there a chore that your significant other absolutely despises with every fibre of their being? Do it for them!

Can you fix it?

Is there something that is precious to them that has been broken recently? You can take the time out to fix it for them as a surprise. Something like a hole in a favourite jumper you could do on your own (or ask Mum…) or if it’s something electronic or more technical, sneak it out to a professional to have it fixed without them knowing. Imagine the surprise they’ll get when they get it back!

Roses and heart with notebook

Love what they love

While lots of couples have many shared interests, others are more of the opposites-attract variety. If you fall into the latter category, think about joining your partner in doing something they love.

It could mean trying out an adventurous outdoor activity, going to the theatre, joining them at a concert of their favourite band, or watching a sports game. Your partner will appreciate you trying something new.

Surprise meal

If you have some free time and your partner is set for a busy day at work or study, you could buy a meal from their favourite restaurant or whip something up at home to take into them for lunchtime.

This will make for a welcome surprise date! If the day is looking waaaaay too busy for them and a lunchbreak isn’t likely, help them to relax when they come home with a dinner instead.

Young Couple Enjoying a Romantic Dinner next to a Fireplace

A photo is worth 1000 words

Fill a small photo album or picture frame with memories of your time together and give it to them just because. Such a cute way to say “I love you!”

Watch their favourite movie

If you love sci-fi action and your partner is a romantic comedy die-hard, consider allowing them to pick some titles they love for a movie marathon night. It will give you an excuse for cuddles on the couch and they will be filled with happiness that you’d handed over the controller for the evening.

i love you

Hold hands

Nothing says I love you like holding hands! And no, It’s not just something for young high school students! Holding hands and giving hugs can be very intimate ways of showing someone you love them without having to head straight for the bedroom all the time (not that there’s anything wrong with that…).

Thoughtful gift

If you see something small and inexpensive at the shops that makes you immediately think of your love, why not buy it for them as a special surprise. You should save the more elaborate gifts for special occasions.

Don't peek!

A ready smile

Smiles are infectious, so if you give your loved one lots of smiles, they won’t be able to help themselves and will have to smile back. This simple act can light up someone’s day and show them that they mean so much to you. This is a simple and sweet way to say I love you!

Tend to them

Whether or not you have uttered the words ‘in sickness and in health’, taking care of someone when they are under the weather is a surefire sign that you love them to pieces.

Woman sneezing

Check out the love languages

Dr Gary Chapman has paved the way in helping couples to determine what their personal love language is. In a nutshell, this is how you prefer to give and receive love.

There is also a handy quiz you can take to find out what your love language is.

Rather than finding a perfect match in your love language, the quiz is a way for you to understand what your partner’s preferences are if they are different to your own. This will help you to build a stronger relationship.

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