How can I tell my guests to get dressed up (politely, of course)?

You’ve done it. You’ve found your dream venue, the flowers you envisioned are available, and the live band is exactly your vibe. But you have one more obstacle: How to tell your guests to get dressed up.

Unless you’re getting married on Whitehaven Beach and shoes are not only optional, but cast aside, then you’re wedding is probably the first time you’re seeing your cousin in a suit. For some people in your life, though, a suit or a nice dress is akin to a prison sentence. However, you might not want all your future photos to include that guy in the shorts.

We tackle the ultimate predicament: How can you tell your guests to get dressed up without seeming like a… Fashion dictator.

Invitations first

It all starts with the invite. This is where your guests can get a vibe for what your wedding theme and overall atmosphere will be. And, spell it out. Sure, you can go for the classic: “Black tie optional” or “Dress code: Cocktail”, but if you’re still concerned about hitting the mark with the guestlist, you can be a bit more prescriptive.

Add a playful line: “Cocktail attire—dust off those dancing shoes!” or “Formal-ish: think less boardroom, more Bond.”

Guests appreciate clarity, and a touch of humour makes it feel less like a command and more like a suggestion they’ll follow.

Want some help with your wedding invite wording? We’ve got your back. Read more.

Wedding website: Style guide

Your guests will visit your wedding website numerous times. From finding accommodation to checking start times, this is your guide to all things wedding-related. And a picture speaks louder than words. Add a mood board or a couple of reference photos. Something like: “We’re going for a garden-party vibe: flowy dresses, linen suits, and hats encouraged!”

This way, your guests know the tone (and can avoid the dreaded outfit mismatch).

Make it about how they will feel too

Instead of being brutal and laying down the law of “no jeans”, try and word it softer. “We can’t wait to see you looking fabulous, the wedding will be photographed.”

This gentle reminder can put the onus back on them that they don’t want to be the one standing out from the crowd in a pair of denim jeans.

Channel your MC to be the bearer of sartorial news

If you’ve got a fun MC or a bridal party group chat, let them be the bearers of the dress code. For those who are normally down the more ‘casual’ end of the spectrum, have these representatives be the mouthpieces: “Can’t wait to celebrate! It’s going to be a dress-to-impress kinda night!”

Sometimes, hearing it from someone else feels less formal and more like an inside scoop. Plus, you’ve got enough on your plate to not worry about some else’s fashion faux pas.

Decode the dress code. What does black tie even mean?! Read here to find out more.

Set the scene, from venue to timing

An evening city wedding in a historical hall just feels like a more formal affair. A daytime wedding in an outside location or urban farm has a more “chic but practical” appeal. Let your invite do the heavy lifting. It’s all about wording.

“Join us for champagne and canapés at sunset in the rose garden.”

Trust us, nobody reads that and thinks, “Perfect—time for my cargo shorts.”

Fashion faux pas are not your fault

Here’s the thing, most guests genuinely want to get it right, they just need a nudge. So be kind and clear, and if all else fails, remember: one rogue outfit makes for a great story later.

Start your wedding planning by finding the perfect venue. And, signing up for Easy Weddings, it’s free.