how many times should i follow up on rsvps before assuming theyre not coming?

Hi there!

It is so sad that we need to follow up on RSVP's at all! 

My suggestion is to follow up twice. Give them a polite nudge to let them know that the RSVP date has passed and ask if they are coming because you need to give the headcount to the venue & caterers. Providing a reason will definitely encourage guests to respond faster as many people are actually quite clueless about what is involved with wedding planning.

It's best not to sound annoyed when you follow up, as some guests might have had their invite lost in the mail or they might be facing personal difficulties that they cannot share with you. Also some guests (such as family members) need to be treated differently to other guests, so it has to be done on a case-by-case basis.

I recommend contacting them directly instead of sending a group message. You can even try asking a family member who is close with the guest to badger them a little.

If asking twice still doesn't elicit a response, you can mark them as not attending & just hope that they don't RSVP "yes" one week before the big day.

Cheers,

Lava

Hello!

This is a great question...I generally say twice.  Life can get busy sometimes and the reply can be mistakingly overlooked or, they know they have to reply but time escapes them.

Follow up once and just say you are following up as you hadn't received a reply from them. After a few days if you have not received a response, I would send a final follow up letting them know you need to confirm their attendance as you have to confirm with caterers and if you don't receive a response by **date** you will mark them as a decline/unable to attend.

Everyone knows weddings take planning and replies need to be collated for suppliers.

Whilst I think generally it's rude for guests not to advise their attendance/non-attendance, sometimes things are happening in their lives and whilst they don't mean to be rude and not reply, their focus is elsewhere and a little message reminding them doesn't go astray. :)

Good luck and I hope you have a fabulous wedding day!! :)

Kind Regards,

Cat x