One of the best things about getting married (aside from the whole new hubby thing) is you get to buy lots of pretty “stuff” – and you get to show it off!

I mean, seriously, as gorgeous as some bridal gowns are, you can’t exactly wear them to your Christmas party and, really, unless your name is Elizabeth or Catherine, tiaras look a little over done.

But on your wedding day, you can wear whatever you want – and everyone has to smile and tell you you’re gorgeous, which, of course, you are!

However, if you’re smart, you can buy gear that is gorgeous – and can be worn more than once.

The gown:
While many of us dream of the big white, fluffy dress, many do not and if it’s not your style,well, why have one? Plenty of designers offer non-traditional wedding gowns and by non-traditional we mean in different styles and colours.

There is so much choice when it comes to wedding gowns that you can easily pick a dress that satisfies the bride in you, but still allows you to use it again.

The bridesmaids’ dresses

Today’s brides tend to be a tad more considerate than some of their predecessors, and frou frou dresses designed to please only the bride and groom are most definitely not de rigeur!

The options available for your bridal party are extensive, so your bridesmaids shouldn’t be uncomforable in a dress that doesn’t suit their size, shape or colouring.

In addition to the presents you’ll no doubt have for your bridesmaids, another lovely touch is to dress them in something they can use again, something that isn’t too “bridesmaidish” and could be worn comfortably at a party or big event.

The jewellery

The beauty of jewellery is that not matter how ostentatious  and blingalicious it may be, something grand enough will eventually come up where you can wear it again – even someone else’s wedding.

Be it hair accessories such as this beautiful vintage inspired hair combs and pins from Fletcher and Grace or your wedding jewellery, look for something that is special and eye-catching, but not ridiculously so. That way, you’ll be able to use it again! Now, that’s smart.

The shoes

Viviene Ivory wedding shoes from Lily Rose Shoes

You can’t have too many shoes, but owning a pair that you can only wear once is, well, sacrilegious! But you’re pretty safe when it comes to shoes.

Like jewellery, the beauty of shoes is that no matter how diamante covered or ostentatious they may be, you can always use them to jazz up a very plain outfit long after your big day.

Just keep in mind that even though many bridal stores sell “normal” shoes designed for everyday wear, some wedding shoes are designed only to be worn once and may not stand the rigours of pavements or city life since they may hvae been fashioned from very delicate materials aimed at looking great rather than providing foot support.

One of the most frequently uttered phrases on our site from brides after their wedding day is “don’t sweat the small stuff”.  Now this is wonderful advice, but when you spend hours cutting and pasting invites, sewing fabric flowers, and making tissue paper pom-pom’s it can be difficult to find perspective.

People will also tell you that it’s “your day, your way!” But when it comes to weddings, everyone is an expert! They will tell you what you “should” have and that they have never seen anyone do what you are doing. For the most part you can ignore those people, but when it comes to family there are just some things you can’t ignore! Guest lists, seating charts, who will be in your bridal party?

When all is said and done, I know my wedding day will be a success, if Craig and I are married and our guests have a good time. So I thought I would share my tips with you – and if someone invents a time machine, I will go back and tell my past self all this stuff!

• Set a realistic budget and stick to it – do some research, work out what style you both like – get some approximate costs and then work out your budget. Don’t assume the cost of anything, you might think your dream dress will only be $1,000 but what if it’s $5,000?
• Work out what’s important! You don’t have to have every element of a typical wedding as a part of your day. Craig and I knew we wanted a venue with a spit roast menu, a fantastic celebrant and a great photographer – everything else was just details.
• Make sure you factor in everything – or add an extra $1000 to your budget.  The Wedding Planning Tools on our site are great. It’s a comprehensive list of everything you will possibly need. Have you thought about where you are the girls are getting ready – how will you get to the ceremony? Wedding lingerie will need to be factored in, most girls can’t wear their comfy t-shirt bra under their wedding dress! Are you getting any beauty treatments? You get the picture! Better to over budget and have spare cash for the honeymoon than be short of cash and have to sell a kidney!
• Judge your creativity objectively! DIY Invites – fun you say? I’m going to rain on your parade! DIY invites can be a great way of saving money – as long as you factor in everything. Printer ink, card paper, printing paper, glue,  a cutting mat, stamps, envelopes etc. You will also need to factor in for any mistakes you make – so you will need to order an extra 5 of everything! Invites weren’t a big deal for us, and I made ours myself, in hindsight, the hours spent bent over a desk with a stanley knife in one hand and 3 fingers on my other hand super glued together don’t seem worth it!
• Keep it simple! There are a million different things you can do on your wedding day, try not to get carried away! Yes the hand made place cards with vintage lace that matches your grandmother’s wedding dress with calligraphy names are going to look awesome, but will anyone else notice? I have DIY’ed a few things and in retrospect could have saved time and money if i’d bought something.
• Surround yourself with positive people.  There is always going to be someone who is going to have a negative spin on everything you plan, stop talking to them! You don’t need to make everyone happy, not everyone is going to love the hand carved maple guest cards you spent hours scouring the darkest corners of the internet to find. Plan to make yourself and your partner happy, that’s all you can and should do!
• Buyer beware! If you are buying online, you are going to find a million options and save a bit of cash as well. Just make sure you actor in shipping costs and the potential for what you ordered to not be exactly right. Finding a replacement after you have already spent money can be frustrating.
• Everything will happen in the last 2 weeks – and it does! You can plan down to the last detail, you can work at a wedding website, you can have lists and charts up to your ears. You will still find a million things to do the last two weeks before your big day. I also had to factor in public holidays, nothing is open on Good Friday, so everything has to be ready by Thursday.
• This is the biggest PARTY of your life. You’re getting married to the man/woman you love, how exciting! You have spent 12-18 months focusing all your time and energy into this day. But at the end of all of it, it is just a party to celebrate the fact that you have married the man/woman of your dreams!  Try to keep your expectations realistic, it might rain, the limo might get a flat tyre, your venue might serve the wrong kind of beef; but in the grand scheme of things does it really matter? Remember to breathe and count to ten.

Of course I can now be put into the “everyone is an expert” category! I am by no means telling you how to plan your day, just a few tips I picked up as I went. For the most part I have had a blast planning our wedding. From painting cake toppers to scouring the internet for shoes, I have had so much fun.  My team at work knows more about this wedding than Craig! They have been my cheerleaders and biggest supporters and I am very grateful they have been here! I think I have even emailed a few sneaky Ask Samantha‘s in!

So in 4 days when I walk down the aisle, I will be thinking about how amazing it is to finally get there! And also hoping it doesn’t rain!

Arm yourself with the questions below before choosing a wedding dress

When it comes to choosing or designing your wedding gown, there’s more to consider than just how jaw-droppingly gorgeous you will look as you walk down the aisle.

Couture wedding dress designer Karen Willis Holmes shares her 10 most important questions to ask any prospective designer before settling on your final dress.

“For a bride there are lots of things to consider and organize for your big day,” says Karen “none of which are more than important than your dress.

“Bridal gown designers should expect to be asked any or all of the 10 questions below, but the questions are not only for the designers.

The brides should think about and answer some of the questions themselves before venturing into a bridal studio.”

1. What is the price of the gown?
There is no point trying on the gorgeous ball gown with the big price tag if, realistically, it isn’t in your budget. By looking at the price tag or letting the sales assistant know your budget this will help them and you to find that perfect gown, but one that won’t break the bank.

2. What is included in the price of the gown?
This is vital when considering your budget as well. Alterations and additional charges can add up depending on what work you may wish to have completed, so knowing what is included and what will cost extra will help with your budgeting.

3. Can the gown be ordered with any changes be made to the patterns or fabrics?
This will differ with every designer you approach and may vary the price, particularly if the material or work required is particularly fiddly.

4. Where is the gown made?
Understand that there are production lead times whether the gown is made in Australian or not, and gowns coming from overseas may be held up in transit or not be quite what you expected.

5. Are there any fittings included in the price?
This can mean a range of different services and varies from designer to designer. In her studio, Karen Willis Holmes defines fittings as:
Ready-to -wear gowns: no fittings or work included in the price of the gown
Demi-couture collection: two fittings to hem the gown to the correct length are included in the price
Couture gowns: five fittings to have the gown made to fit your exact body shape and design requirements

6. How long will it take to order the gown? What would be the due date?
Understanding that there are production lead times whether the gown is made in Australian or not and gowns coming from overseas may be held up in transit. Most designers ask for a minimum 6 months lead-time.

7. Can you do alterations for me if needed?
The chances of requiring some sort of alteration, even if it’s just a hemline, are high and though they look easy, particularly on a complex wedding gown, a skilled seamstress is not easy to find. The work is likely to take longer than you may think. Don’t risk ruining your gown by whipping out the sewing machine and doing it youself (unless you’re an experienced seamstress, of course). It would be a pity to ruin the gown at this stage if the work is done badly.

Questions/tasks  for the bride:
8. Have you checked out the designer’s reputation?
Do your research online about the company you want to purchase you dress from Check there are no re-occurring complaints and general feedback of negligence. Search forums and general feedback on sites such as Easy Weddings which offers brides the chance to write reviews of vendors they’ve used..

9. Have they been a good company to deal with?
Even if it’s only on the phone, do you like the ‘vibe’ of the place? Will you be treated properly after you have purchased your gown? This is important every bride should have an enjoyable shopping experience!

10. Are you happy with the quality of the gowns?
When you are in store look at the quality of the gowns in general and ask yourself: are you happy with the workmanship and fabrics used on their gowns?

“So with these questions in the back of your mind, embrace the wedding dress shopping experience and have fun,” says Karen, “It is a happy time of your life that should be remembered!”

Visit Karen’s profile on Easy Weddings

My fabulous online wedding planner has told me that there are 305 days until our wedding! Which is still a lot of time but the numbers are slowly getting smaller, I can imagine the big day being here in no time.

One of the things I have found difficult with my planning is trying to keep track of everything I need to do.  Some of the things I have left on my colour coded checklist are:

• Order our wedding cake
• Finalise the invitation designs – order paper, envelopes and stamps
• Finalise the guest list
• Find wedding night accommodation
• Book a Makeup Artist
• Finalise the bridesmaids and groomsmen clothing and accessories
• Order my engagement party outfit
• Find a wishing well
• Choose a henna design
• Decide whether to use ready made table runners or DIY
• Order my wedding dress
• Finish Karishmafying my ceremony shoes
• Order reception outfit and find jewellery
• Order Craig’s suit, shirt and shoes
• Find organza bags for bomboniere
• Order parasols for photos (for the BM’s and I)

There are a few more things that need to be added to that list, so I am finding the online planner really helpful!

I can tick off the things that I have finalised and can add in my little extras as well – since our wedding is cross-cultural there are some things that aren’t on the site’s list.

My checklist in the Easy Weddings online wedding planning tools

I like ticking boxes and crossing off items in a list – so this is perfect for me! Plus I can access it anywhere which means I don’t have to wait until I get home to update my list, of course I don’t do any wedding planning at work, cough cough. You try not looking at wedding stuff when you’re surrounded by it all day!

My plan is to have 90% of my planning done by the end of the year and then just sit back and enjoy the parties leading up to the big day – so far so good!

Artificial Bouquet

Starting to think about the floral arrangements, bouquets etc. So now the question arises, should I go with real or fake? I was set on using real flowers, that is  until I saw a bouquet that a girlfriend had bought online.

From a distance it looked real. It was only once you got closer that you realised it was artificial.  The photo of the artificial bouquet speaks for itself.

I’ve discussed this with both our mum’s and funnily enough, they reacted the same way. They seemed very surprised and somewhat disappointed that the idea of using fake flowers came up at all. But I have to give it to them, they were both willing to let me run with the idea if it was what we really wanted.

Personally I prefer real flowers, but there are the pro’s that make you stop and think about it that little bit harder. The most obvious being the lasting power of artificial bouquets. After all, nobody wants a wilted bouquet in their wedding photos and most certainly not me.

What my girlfriend paid for her bridal and 3 bridesmaid bouquets was alot less than what you’d pay for the real mccoy.  I’ll be speaking to a florist soon, so we’ll see what we see and make a decision then.

But deep down my gut is already telling me that I’ll go with the real deal. There’s just something about the real flowers that appeals to me, where the artificial ones don’t.

Grecian goddess: How gorgeous is this dress?

It’s funny how we start of with an idea in our minds of what we do and don’t like, only to find our final choices making a beeline for the opposite direction to where we were headed.

My number 1 thing was I didn’t want long gowns for my Bridesmaids. I think it was less because of what I actually wanted & more due to a comment that someone had made before, about long gowns making people look older.

When my mum suggested the long gowns, I vehemently rejected the idea, giving her all the reasons in the world, as to why the bridesmaids couldn’t wear long gowns.

One of my bridesmaids is my 12 year old daughter. She’s going to be my junior bridesmaid. I needed something that would suit her too. To make things more difficult, I wanted all 3 girls to wear the same dress.

It’s a good thing she’s also extremely tall. She’s stands just over an inch over me, so the dress length won’t be so much of an issue and at her height, she could be fitted into any number of the bridesmaid dresses that are out there.

I had my eyes on something like this number

Henri Josef "Lee"

But I had my misgivings because to me, it wouldn’t look complete unless you had a nice pair of strappy heels to go with it. Heels were a definite NO-NO for Tyra. I mean cmon! a 12 year old in heels just doesn’t seem right to me.

So where did that leave me now…I went back to the drawing board and started brainstorming with myself again..BIG MISTAKE! What I should have done was discuss this with my bridesmaid’s straight away. The girls would’ve been able to look at gowns with an open mindedness that I didn’t have, as I was already locked into my own idea of the perfect bridesmaid gown.

Anna & Jen both know Tyra and they also know how tall she is. So it wasn’t long before I had a call from Jen telling me she had found a “possible dress” BUT it was LONG…

Tempted to say NO, I held back and thought “what’s there to lose” by just looking. So look I did! My adversity to the long gowns quickly disappeared after that! The gown was ideal!! It would flatter all the girls and yet still leave Tyra with her 12 year old innocence. The heels weren’t an issue either, as Tyra could pair this dress up with a nice pair of gold strappy flat sandals, while the older girls wore strappy heels.

So after eating my words and calling mum  to tell her about the “long” gown and showing her a picture, then checking with my other bridesmaid. the final consensus was that we HAD to get this dress!

Not really looking forward to the damage this was going to cost to our wallets, I asked Jen to get me the dress cost! Surprise, surprise it was less than half of what I’d expected to spend originally for a gown. At about $90 per gown, this dress was a BARGAIN!! Certainly ALOT cheaper than the $200-$300 price tags I’d seen in various Sydney stores.

We ordered the dress from the UK based ASOS website and it wasn’t long at all before we had it in our hot little hands!

All the girls looked as great as I thought they would and Tyra maintained her childish looks.

Not only did we find the dress, but it also gave me the theme on which to base their hairstyles and accessories on.

In my mind I was now looking at 3 Grecian Goddesses!

Eat your heart out, Aphrodite!…

Of course they can, but says Moira Nell from First Wedding Portraits in Perth. “It’s like comparing a DIY hubby to an architect or electrician.”

Moira, who has been photographing weddings for many years, acknowledges that there are plenty of cost effective ways to capture photos on your wedding day, but that it may not always be the wisest option.

“It’s fantastic that the digital camera has created a wide range of possibilities for wedding couples and it’s great that you can get such a full coverage of your day with all your friends and family snapping away,” says Moira, “but be careful when deciding on whether to do away with a professional photographer and replace them with Uncle Joe or Cousin Sammy who usually “takes a good shot”.

Moira says that professional photographers have proper equipment (that can cost upwards of $6,000) rather than basic compact camera, and that many undergo at least a year of study in areas of photography, editing, exposure etc.

They also know what shots to get and the combination of their skill and equipment means you’re likely to get a far better (and more memorable) shot than those taken by happy snappers.

“This is your wedding day. It can never be redone, reposed or relived. If the photos are disappointing (which they may well be) not only will you feel robbed of your memories of your perfect day – complete with gorgeous dress, perfect hair and stunning make up – your family member will feel guilty and awkward about it too!”

Of course, there are plenty of great photographers who aren’t necessarily professional, but when making this very big decision, just keep the potential consequences in mind. Personally, I’d scrimp on other areas of my wedding and use that saved dough on a great wedding photographer, but then I do like a good photo!

Villa Capri Function Centre

Trying to choose our church and reception venues brought in our first real dilemma (well, for me anyway)

My mother wanted it at her local parish which is just down the road from where we live.

His parents wanted it at their local parish, which…YES, you guessed it..was just down the road from where they lived.

Between our 2 houses is a 25-30 minute drive, not taking into account people driving from other areas altogether.

So one way or the other, one side was going to be disappointed.

The morning “Tea Ceremony” was the decider. This happens first thing in the morning BEFORE the church ceremony

Because the tea ceremony ends at his parent’s house, we figured it was only logical that we choose a church closer to my in-laws.

We decided on Sacred Heart Church and locked it in for 11am.

I love the quaintness of this church and the prayer garden outside.

Now on to the reception…

Our decision to pick Villa Capri Function Centre (also in Cabramatta) was primarily due to our guest list.

A large majority of our 360 -400 guest lived out this way already. They could all be there in a jiffy!!

To make things easier for my side who now need to do the most traveling, we’re going to hire coaches to ferry them to & from the reception!!

This is ideal coz now everybody can eat, Drink (LOTS!), and be merry without the hassle of a long drive home!

Craig tends to roll his eyes…a lot…when anything remotely wedding related is mentioned, he was however quite certain about what he wanted to wear on the day. He wanted a  Mandarin collared suit and shirt, and absolutely no tie!

I started in our directory for this search I had seen some suits that matched Craig’s description – but I look at wedding images all day, who was the supplier – no idea!

I then stumbled across Eleganza Formalwear in Sydney who deliver Australia wide, they had exactly the suit Craig wanted – problem solved! Tatiana was really helpful and we have organised to order the suits later in the year.

I got very lucky finding this - I haven't seen anything like it since...

The shirt was another story – I looked everywhere. Given that the style Craig wanted was suit specific, I had a hard time finding anything remotely suitable, unless he wanted to wear a Chef’s tunic! So I went to my trusty Plan B – eBay. I was spoiled for choice – there were so many colours and styles I wanted to get him 5 of them! But I restrained myself and just bought one to see what the quality was like, Craig has given it his seal of approval.

We are now asking Craig’s groomsmen if they want a similar suit and shirt. Craig will also wear a red vest, the groomsmen will wear a black one.

I have also ordered a little surprise for all three of them – but more on that later!

Ita Buttrose's indispensible guide to the rules of etiquette in Australia covers everything from wine, the workplace and, of course, weddings.

Times may have changed but, according to Ita Buttrose, good manners never go out of fashion. And, of course, she’s spot on.

Ita may be best known (and admired) for her serious media credentials, but she’s no slouch when it comes to etiquette, or should that be Itaquette?

Her latest offering, A Guide to Australian Etiquette for All Occassions, from Weddings to Work offers sage advice on how to behave at all levels of society, from a day of AFL down at the “G” to the correct way to use post-nominals should you ever be privileged enough to be awarded an Order of Australia title.

But a significant portion of the book is taken up with our favourite topic, yes, weddings, and Ita advises on everything from who pays for what during a wedding to how to ask, oh-so-politely, for cash gifts rather than opting to receive another three toasters or dining sets.

Delicate subjects such as pre-nuptial agreements (called Binding Financial Agreements in Australia) and cancelling an engagement or weddings are aso covered, but Ita’s book is also filled with practical wedding related topics, too; you’ll find perfect wording for invitations, how to recall an acceptance to a wedding you can no longer attend as well as detailing the duties of each member of the bridal party.

Never one to shy away from embarrassing topics, Ita explains how to handle letting one rip in polite company or the correct way to de-friend someone on Facebook.

In this day and age where some people genuinely don’t know how to act in certain circumstances, Ita’s Aussie guide to etiquette is indispensible and, at the very least, most informative and entertaining.

Ita’s fabulous (and often hilarious) book is out now and retails for $29.95.